" Resolutions "

I've been thinking a lot lately about "New Years Resolutions"

as I do every year since I can remember.

I have never made one. Never. 

This fact has lead me to wondering why I never have. I understand the whole concept of a fresh start, a new beginning, a "New Year". But until today I couldn't figure out why I have never made one for myself.

Every person that I have ever known has made at least one resolution at one time or another in their life but not me.

"Is there something wrong with me?", I've wondered. Am I afraid of disappointing myself or someone that I love? Truthfully, nearly every year I've just sort of dismissed it as a silly promise that we try to make to ourselves. And ultimately, we fail.

Today I was thinking about my life. My past, my present. I realized something very important. No matter how hard I have planned for something, ultimately it was up to God weather or not "MY PLAN" came to fruition.

I also realized that my life has been filled with SO many highs and lows that it would be impossible to control no matter how hard that I try. 

If I were the richest woman on earth, would that guarantee that my life, my family or my happiness couldn't be yanked away in an instant?

Of coarse not. Wealth is just what one thinks it is. It could mean money to some, jewels, clothes, whatever.

 And while I am by no monetary means rich, I have what I have been given. I have a wonderful, hard working husband that loves me unconditionally. I have three very intelligent children who have blessed me with their presence. I have two sweet, innocent and adorable grandchildren that love their grandma.

I have a beautiful home, some loving pets, clothes on my back, heat in the winter, cool in the summer and food on the table.

I have love. I didn't PLAN on all of that. I didn't make any resolutions to make it better. Actually it's pretty good the way it is.

In other peoples eyes I am most likely inferior. I've never planned out my life. I am not a career woman. I never graduated from college. I just lived my life day to day. And I still do.

But you know there is something to be said about taking that leap.

Closing your eyes and just letting yourself fall backwards knowing that you WILL be caught.

 

So have I made a resolution this year? No. 

There is already a plan for me and I want to be surprised.

In the meantime I will continue to be me. God seems to like that. I will continue to do the best that I can in this life that I have been blessed with.

And really, isn't that all that we're supposed to do?