My Craw

I gotta new craw. And yes I know that I am not using this word in it's proper definition yet any of you folks over 50 will know what I mean. 

I gotta a new craw. The store within the store. I know, I know it's been around for a long time, Most of you are probably fine and used to it but yet I find it a bit strange.

I live in a small town. O.K. city by definition. I think it's so funny to have a hardware store inside the grocery store.

A coffee store inside the book store. 

Another coffee store inside a grocery store.

Good Lord I must be aging myself!! I'm just waiting for a store inside a store inside another
 store! 

It's alright, I can handle it. My lid is still on if you know what that means. 

Lord knows I am showing my age. Thats alright. We all grew up in a different generation.

Now I will tell you something that I told my husband today while grocery shopping at Wal-Mart. He had noticed that some transexuals were going into the bathrooms of thier choice.

I think he was a bit confused as to what he should be feeling about it. This is what I told him, without shame or embarresment.

We grew up in a different generation. A different era. At our age we too should be allowed to feel what we feel. To us it feels wrong and I refuse to be embarresed or wrong. I am 58 years old. I am not going to change my believes or feelings at this point in my life.

I don't like it. Use your own bathroom. Don't shove your transgender shit in my face. 

I am a senior citizen and I refuse to change my believes that I was taught growing up. That my Dear friends is my right.

So in summary I say, Pull up your pants, use the bathroom that you were taught to use, feel free to be beautiful and express yourself, just do me a favor and get a job in a store within a store!

A Magical Night

It is Wednesday May 11th, 12:09 A.M.

I just took my dogs out for their final walk for the night. 

I've been inside most of the day cleaning house as it was my day off.

Ahhh, Final chore of the day, walk the dogs before bed.

I don't know that I can put into words what a beautiful night I discovered. It was warm but not too much so. Comfortable. 

Oh so quite but for the tree frogs that were singing in such beautiful harmony. It was if they were getting paid to sing in such lovely , low, quite beautiful tones.

And then there was the fog. This ethereal , calming, quite fog.

I tell you this was a beautiful night. I think it will be a very long time before I see another one like this.

Nesting

So you do realize that I am 57 years old right? I have six grandchildren, two from my son and four we picked up when he got remarried all of whom are all sweet as apple pie!! And now I am expecting my seventh grandchild who will be delivered from my youngest, I repeat, youngest, daughter.

I repeat this because I have discovered that it is totally different when a son has children then when your BABY girl has a child. I was fortunate to be close , at the time, with my ex daughter in law so I was very involved. Since then she's become a bit batty but thank heaven my son his an amazing dad.

Back to my BABY girl having a baby. She is twenty years old. I was nineteen when I gave birth to my son so I know how grown up she , O.K. I know how grown up "SHE" feels at this time. However I still feel as though she is my baby having a baby.

Right now she is in the hospital two hours from home. Complications. The good news is tomorrow she will be 35 weeks and the baby "Boy" is doing fine. Yet my baby girl's health is at risk. What a messed up situation.

My husband has been on vacation and I had four days off from work as the baby shower was supposed to be yesterday. No shower. Vacation ends tomorrow and I go back to work tomorrow. What a messed up situation.

Fortunately, baby's daddy will be able to stay with my daughter for two days before he has to go to work again. Tomorrow we are supposed to find out if and when but mostly if, she will be able to come back home before delivering our new grandson. I know in my heart that she is in the best place for her right now. But my heart hurts because I can't be there with her.

I am packing a bag in case I have to leave work on short notice. But a two hour drive on short notice can seem like forever.

As for the nesting part. I did it with all three of my children and surprisingly I found myself doing it tonight for my daughter and her little boy. They live upstairs from us.
You can be sure that it will be all ready, cleaned, and in tip top shape before the week is out.

I'm probably just working the worry and stress out by doing all of this cleaning. But it sure as shit feels like I'm nesting!!!

Long Time No Post

Gosh it's been a year since I've posted! I wasn't sure what if anything has changed at Blogger so I thought I'd give it a go.

Since I've been working full time I sort of gave up on posting. It was a bit difficult keeping up with it and also reading other blogs. I may not post again for another year but whatever I'm here now.

My job and home life consumes every waking moment that I have. This is not always a good thing but it's also not so horrible. I still love my job which I've been at for two years now but it also makes me realize that I am aging as I hurt most of the time. And according to my youngest daughter of twenty, I look tired. She thought it was just that day but I went on to tell her that is how I look all of the time now. The only thing I can do is cover it with make-up! 

Over the last year a lot of events have taken place in our family. My oldest daughter got married in October of last year. Hard to believe they are coming up on a first anniversary already! My son remarried on April 1st of this year which also means that my husband and I acquired four new grandchildren for a total of six. Our youngest daughter is 34 weeks pregnant so it will soon be seven. It's been a good year for all of us. A happy year.

The baby shower is this coming Saturday. We will be having another grandson for a total of four. How awesome.

Well I did it, I posted. Don't know if I'll do it again or not. But either way, thanks for reading if you've come this far. 

Wow I haven't Blogged in so, so long. I don't even know where to begin!!
I must say that I don't even remember how to do it at this point so it may seem a bit random.
So here goes.

I love my job. I am considered a Dementia Care Specialist. Never in my wildest dreams would I have expected to be where I am today. I've had many small jobs, raised a family of three. All I ever wanted to do was to be a housewife and mother. I achieved that and more. I am a grandmother now as well. This is what I thought my life would always be.

One year ago I took my Certified Nursing Assistant  class and exam . I hadn't planned this at all. I was just trying to give my youngest some moral support at the time. She dropped out of class after two days and I stayed on and LOVED it.

I passed every test with an "A". I am very proud of that being that I was 55 years old at the time.  What a trip people. Doing something that spur of the moment that you've never thought of doing before.

Alzheimer's/Dementia is my specialty. I love it. So challenging, and mostly rewarding. For now I am very happy with my choice however I have been considering Hospice work.   

" Adventures in Cleaning."

My usual morning at work starts pretty early around 6:30 a.m. From then on things go pretty fast and furious. The very first thing that I do is clean twenty-two bathrooms.

Yes ya'll heard me right. Twenty- two bathrooms. And if the good Lord see's fit that day, I will get them done by 11:00 a.m. Mind you, not EVERY bathroom gets the "works" every single morning but they do get at the very least, tidied.

In addition to the bathrooms which are THE most important rooms to be cleaned, I also clean 13 double apartments and 4 singles. 2 full dining room/kitchens as well as 2 huge living room areas, various offices and activity rooms. It's a big house. I am the only housekeeper and I love it. I also do a bit of C.N.A. work on the side. It's funny how God works. I'm a trained C.N.A. yet here I am "The Housekeeper". They like my work apparently. It's fine with me as I get to do two things that I love. I know each and every resident, all 30 plus of them and love them all. So keeping their living areas clean for them is important to me. I feel, in essence, The Keeper of the House.

Before I even walked in the door this morning, one of our fellow C.N.A.'s proceeded to tell me that Mr. X's room had been invaded by ants last night. Seriously invaded. I had been seeing them here and there and was assured by my boss that it was time for the exterminator's to make a visit.

 My place of employment, I would say, is cleaner than my own home. Being that I am a cleaning nut and have been referred as "Anal" ( A word that I had to look up !) by my family, when hearing about the infestation, I knew we had a problem.

Shortly after my arrival this morning, feeling sick as a dog on top of the infestation warning, I was asked ever so sweetly by my boss to do a thorough cleaning in Mr. X's room. So of coarse I went to the task immediately. 

It wasn't long after that when the exterminators showed up. It was time for our yearly treatment anyway. 

I tell you my friend it was pure joy doing a thorough cleaning of Mr. X's apartment. I only wish that I had the time to clean everyone's apartments like that. The down side was most of my regular duties were a bit neglected today, add to that as as soon as I finished Mr.X's room, I was told of a "Mess" that also needed a thorough cleaning in Mr. Z's room.

I didn't have any spare time to spend with Mr. Y, who is competition for my husband!! Yesterday he fell out of his wheelchair while trying to get into his recliner. I heard his calls for help and ran to his rescue as quickly as my artificial knees would take me. The first thing we are taught to do is access the situation. Check for anything that may be an immediate danger and then ask if the resident is hurt. Silly me, I didn't ask Mr. Y if he was hurt but instead asked him if he was alright? To which he replied, "Of coarse I'm not alright, I'm laying on the damn floor!!". I felt the idiot while checking his body for any physical abnormalities that may have occurred from the fall. I walkied for help to get him into his chair. I just hope he's still willing to share an afternoon ice cream treat with this idiot!!

 I did get to sit for a few minutes at the end of the day with Mrs. A. today. She drives everyone batty. But She loves me and I her !! She has a mouth on her!! It would make a young woman blush. Maybe that's why I love her so!! She also loves coffee. I always bring her coffee. She calls me her sweetie pie. 

I have some sort of bug which has been going around my place of employment and have been so tired and sick the past two nights. But my heart is still full of happiness and love. Enough to share with them all. Prayerfully, I will feel better tomorrow. There's a lot of work to be done.

More on Mr. Y later !!

" What A Difference A Day Makes. Or Rather, Five Months. "

Life is so full of twists and turns. I believe most of us would like to think that we have some sort of control over those twists and turns but the fact of the matter is that we really don't have too much of a say in the matter of where our paths will lead us.

Case in point. 

Almost exactly five months ago I was just going along with my normal self. Ha, I bit boring but somewhat contented at the same time. Always the mother that I am,  I still lived most of my life for my children, always having this feeling of needing to be there for whatever they may need. I held off on going to work full time as I felt that would be selfish in some strange way as I wouldn't "BE THERE" at a moments notice for whatever trial and or tribulation that may pop up at a moments notice for my children.

The children that I speak of being 35, 32 and 18 years of age.

Silly I know. I do believe that I raised them well. 

Not perfectly mind you but well.

Back to five months ago. 

My youngest daughter, Katie. My baby, decided that she wanted to sign up and try a C.N.A coarse. Her father and I never stopped any of our children from trying out something that interested them so we agreed to pay for the coarse.

Now for a dream of mine that was always in the back of my mind. I have always wanted to be a nurse but never ever had the confidence in myself to go for it until 19 years ago when I actually signed up for a college entrance exam for nursing school.

I passed all but the math. I would have had to taken a math coarse in order to take the nursing classes . Back then my confidence level was very low so I used that as an excuse to not pursue my dream which was just as well because shortly after that I discovered  that I was pregnant with Katie.

It turned out to be a difficult pregnancy at 36 years of age for me. I was put on bed rest for the last six months. The dream sort of faded away. Sort of.

Five months ago when Katie signed up for the class, she wasn't in a very good place. I suggested and decided that I would also sign up for the C.N.A. class with her. I thought  "Why not.", I have nothing better to do.

Truthfully, knowing my children as I do, I didn't think that Katie would make it through this class as she can't even clean dog messes without complaint but I went with her the first day anyway thinking that perhaps she may be serious about this.

She dropped out after the second class. I stayed. By myself. A bit odd for me but I did it none the less. I went everyday of the eight week class. I went through my clinicals, met some pretty awesome people and impressed myself with my "A" average. 

I have always lived for my children and husband so this was a major accomplishment for me. Doing something completely for myself. It felt very strange yet very good as well. It felt right.

I took the state exam after the class. I passed. Wow. What an accomplishment for me. I never would have dreamed that I could accomplish this. But I did.

Because of Hippa laws I cannot write or talk about where I have worked or where I am working. I can however reveal this much, I feel very, very blessed right now. Come back in six months and I may tell you something different. For now though I can see myself staying where I am at until I cannot work anymore.

I work strictly with Alzhiemers/Dementia residents and I do love this work so much. I have researched, learned and am learning more about this disease everyday. I am now qualified as a Dementia care specialist. How and why I still don't quite understand. I just know that it feels right and I love what I am doing. I think I will be very good at it!!

Now back to five months ago. 

If you would have told me then that I would be doing what I am doing, I don't think that I would have believed you.

And this just goes to show you how fast life goes.

You may be going along thinking that your life is what it is and then all of a sudden you may be thrown into a completely different place.  

Life is a highway..